If you heard Richard Dawson’s voice when you read the title of this post, it’s time for you to schedule a colonoscopy.

Today is Day + 82 post stem cell transplant, and it is time for a health update. My bone marrow biopsy taken on St. Patrick’s Day showed no abnormalities in my blood, which is now 100% donor, and no cancer cells or blasts were detected in either my blood or marrow. However, the gene mutations I had pre-transplant are still there, lurking in the quiet, but now is not the time to worry about them. The Epstein Barr reactivation is proving to be stubborn and the virus doesn’t want to vacate my immune system despite ongoing treatment, but otherwise, everything looks to be good. I’m exactly where I am supposed to be recovery-wise, and my next biopsy is scheduled for June.

That’s all fine and good, but none of these transplant-medical-industry terms tell you about how I feel. 

Picture Forrest Gump sitting on his bench and telling the nurse sitting next to him that his Mama said life was like a box of chocolates because you never know what you’re going to get.

That adage perfectly describes the last month.

Each day is different, and at times, each hour is different. Most of the time I feel okay with little to no pain, but my energy level and appetite waxes and wanes. I’m trying to establish a routine, but a routine isn’t conducive on days when my body is moving at the speed of a blobfish. I attempted a short, gentle yoga sequence the other day and spent more time lying on my mat than actively moving. That’s not failure, that’s accepting my right now self in my right now moment, and I still connected with my body, mind, and soul.

The Graft versus Host Disease (GVHD) is monkeying around with skin rashes and a nuisance low-grade fever, but my doctor wants these incidents because it shows my donor dude’s cells are active. My skin has shed several times, which is normal but makes me feel like a reptile. Add that creature to the ever-growing list of what has created the unfinished JILLPOOL, which is a work in progress for sure and will take years to finish building.

Survey says that I’ve blathered on long enough about my health, so let’s change the subject.

I dusted off one of the two half-written novels that reside on my hard drive and have been making slow progress on the manuscript. It’s challenging yet exciting to be writing fiction again. I’ve also been working on other projects and planning out some possible future offerings that combine yoga with journaling.

I am tuned into the sights, sounds, and smells of spring, the season of rebirth. How appropriate! One of my favorite bird songs is that of the song sparrow. His call is on the quiet side and sounds like a little whistle, soft and soothing, and I smile when I hear it. It drizzled on and off yesterday, and even though it was cold, I opened the door several times to breathe in deep the aroma of the freshly fallen rain. I’ve taken a few short, device-free mindful walks around my neighborhood. The yellows of the forsythia, the pinks of the cherry blossoms, and the whites of the magnolias seem brighter this year, more vibrant yet soft, like they were painted by hand. Hearing the children playing outside and the ice cream truck’s teasing tune as it drives around the neighborhood provide a sense of normalcy when there’s absolutely nothing normal about what I am going through.

Survey says? 

Today is a gift. Treat it as such. Take things a moment at a time, because you never know what you’re going to get. 

And you never know what’s coming next.

Thank you for joining me on my journey. I’m so glad you are here.

With light and love,

Jill

“Cancer-Cation Chronicles 006: Survey Says?” was posted on jillocone.com on April 6, 2025. Artificial Intelligence (AI) was not used at all in creating or writing this post. Views and opinions expressed in this post are solely those of the writer, who was not endorsed or compensated in any manner by any entity; views do not represent any of Jill Ocone’s employers. Copyright 2025, Jill Ocone. All rights reserved. Contact Jill for reposting, licensing, and publishing inquiries using any of the links below.